Ghosting 101

Ghosting is the sudden cessation of communication with someone without any explanation. Though it occurs in various aspects of life, it is perhaps most prevalent in the dating world. Imagine everything moving smoothly in a budding relationship, and suddenly, one party vanishes without a trace. Ghosting often happens when there's no official relationship, just an understanding or budding connection that abruptly meets silence.

Ghosting doesn't just happen in romantic relationships; it can also occur in friendships or the job market. The lack of closure can be frustrating for those left wondering why communication stopped and can lead to confusion and hurt.

The Two Sides of Ghosting

Interestingly, there are two sides to ghosting. Sometimes, ghosting may happen due to a lack of self-awareness from the person experiencing it. They might not realize an action or statement they made may have been a dealbreaker for the other party. On the other hand, it could also be that the ghoster has their own preferences, expectations, or issues they haven't communicated.

Casper the Not-So-Friendly Ghost

Wondering if you're being ghosted? Typically, if someone with whom you've communicated regularly suddenly stops responding, it's likely ghosting. However, ghosters may also engage in "caspering," where they gradually reduce communication without a definitive break. Casperers think they're "softening the blow" by not cutting you off cold turkey, but by continuing to string you along, casperers are just as bad - if not worst - as your standard ghoster.

Why People Ghost

The reasons behind ghosting are varied. Some people ghost to avoid conflict. They may be uncomfortable voicing their feelings or believe that their reasons for ending the connection wouldn't be understood. Others perceive ghosting as a necessary step in navigating the overwhelming choices available in the modern dating scene.

Getting Ghosted is a Net Positive

Getting ghosted can feel hurtful, but it’s essential to see it as a positive. It serves as a stark indication that the person is not a match for you. This realization can free you from wasting further emotional energy on someone not aligned with your long-term goals.

How to Avoid Being a Ghoster

To avoid being a ghoster yourself, practice honest and clear communication. If you're not interested in continuing a connection after a few dates, communicate your feelings kindly. This doesn't mean delivering a breakup speech, but a simple text expressing a lack of romantic interest can go a long way in providing closure for both parties. For instance, you could say:

“Hi John, I hope you're doing well, I've enjoyed getting to know you, but after giving it some thought, I've realized I don't see us moving forward romantically, I think it's best for us to part ways now, and I want to be honest with you about how I feel. Thank you for understanding and I wish you all the best.”

The Do's and Don'ts of Getting Ghosted

If you find yourself ghosted, the first step is to process your feelings and find closure within yourself. Reflect on why the experience bothers you and consider exploring other dating prospects with a positive mindset. Avoid fixating on the reason behind ghosting and instead focus on building a life filled with fulfilling activities and relationships.

What not to do? Don’t hold on to hope that the ghoster will return, and absolutely don’t welcome them back if they reach out again after ghosting you. It’s crucial to set boundaries and uphold them, ensuring you’re respected and valued in any future connections.

Big Pink Question

Every episode ends with a Big Pink Question, a powerful reflection prompt to help you practically apply sentiments from today’s episode directly into your dating and relationship life in a transformative way. This episode's Big Pink Question is:

If you've ever been ghosted or ghosted someone else, how did you experience and manage your emotions, and how did these experiences shape your views on communication and closure in dating?

Take some time to reflect or journal on this prompt. You never know what a good reflection will help you discover!

Affirmations

Affirmations are powerful tools you can use to transform your dating and relationship life, whether you're single and mingling or already in a committed relationship.

Affirmations are positive statements that you repeat to yourself to foster a mindset of positivity and self-empowerment by rewiring your brain to focus on a belief in your ability to accomplish your goals and outcomes.

These mental shifts reshape your internal dialogue, motivate you to take action, boost your emotional well-being, and offer you the strength to pursue goals despite challenges.

Follow @pinkpositivedatingon Instagram for daily affirmations to transform your love life. These affirmations can you help build confidence in your ability to find a suitable romantic partner, build a strong positive mindset to succeed at modern dating, and help you attract and strengthen romantic relationships.

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Timestamps

Want to hear more about the points highlighted in the blog? Use the podcast timestamps to easily navigate to something you want to hear more about in the show!

00:00 I’ve been ghosted…now what?!

01:35 Blown Off and Self Awareness

06:04 Why People Ghost

07:30 The Benefits of Getting Ghosted

10:13 How to Avoid Being a Ghoster

12:30 What to Do If You Get Ghosted

14:27 What NOT to Do If You Get Ghosted

17:28 Big Pink Question

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Important Links

At Pink Positive Dating, our mission is to serve as a positive space for uplifting conversations of building happy healthy romantic relationships. Want to learn more? Check out the links below for insights, real conversations, and high vibes ✨

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Next Steps

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